stupendous is ten
wonderful is nine
gorgeous is eight
amazing is seven
superb is six
great is five
and yet l.o.v.e. is only a four letter word?


first kiss

i’m hatching a plan
i need a thug, who is quite skilled and experienced, and who,
for a moderate fee,
will cause me not insignificant (but not life threatening)
brain injury
so that i might taste the sweet ecstasy
of our first kiss, once again

indifferent fantasy, the dream

she opened up to me, and she opened up to me. i expected flow’ering of love and such but instead got words of foul stench and fuck fuck fuck dirrrrty disgust. that made me harder and made me grin with a smeared red and rotten mouth.

the next morning i woke wrapped in stained sheets and stained but indifferent memory. she brought me breakfast with welt marks on her ass and rope burns on her wrists

, but she kissed me gently and strummed her fingers on my bare chest as i ate. she told me she loved me. that made me harder and made me grin with a greased butter and bacon mouth.


this is gonna hurt
but you’re ready
yes, i’m ready
you’re prepared, and you’re smart
i have the perfect plan
you’re stronger then ever
i’m strong and i’ll fly
you’ll fly high noah
this is gonna hurt, but i’ll fly, and i’ll fly, and i’ll soar

letter to depression

dear depression,

i never got to know you. i slipped past you without a touch, but i will never forget that rancid smell. i passed you by with just an echo of anxiety, and i ran hard. i ran fast and i ran ran ran away.

i dare to look backwards and there’s no sign of you. are you lurking someplace, hidden from view? no, i can hear someone else behind me, also running. you must be chasing them now. i know i’m safe from you. i have a running partner too, and she’ll keep me running in the right direction.


yellow dress

across the other side of the park from where i sat, there stood a young woman. she wore a yellow dress. she was looking up into the branches of the tree that shaded her. she held her arms out to the side, palm facing upwards, and she gently swayed like the breeze. the world passed her by. time passed her by, but still,

she danced
in the shade
like the breeze
in that yellow
fantastic dress.

she, as now i, was lost in this moment.

in the breeze her hair flitter’ed, her dress flapp’ed, and my heart flutter’ed when she stopped and stood still. she slowly reached her hands higher to the branches above that shaded her. gently falling was a flower, from that tree, shaken loose by the breeze that swayed her. she cupped her hands and let the flower land gently in her palms. lifting it to her face, she breathed in it’s fantastic frangance. then as quickly as her smile beamed and lit up the shade of the branches above her, she let the flower float off in the breeze once more.

i looked down the blank page of the note pad in my lap and wrote “across the other side of the park from where i sat”. when i looked back up, the girl in the fantastic yellow dress was gone.

letter : morning

dear morning,

thankyou for coming, and thankyou for the light. i know there will be night again when you have to leave, but i am content in the knowledge that you’ll be back. i can trust you. i do trust you. i trust that with every you, every night is less dark than the one before.

your friend,

three cats

when where the good ol’ days?
i’m not sure exactly, but i’m willing to bet it was some time
before the woman in the street with the three cats started
screaming her fucking lungs out about something i can’t
even understand


there was rain all the night and i woke
at a quarter past somethin’
with memories of a dream
and i tossed and turned and you
(tossed and turned)
me over and over
until the rain blew in and the sheets
were wet, and we lay in the bliss
of the morning