ubiquitous gamble

I tinkered with tip toes across all that was luscious and oh-so just so. Some things remain the same today, as they were in those early days. That same, common unknown transcendent state of being within the dreary days we share. Now it ping-pongs somewhere between bland and jealousy, or between desire and couldn’t care less-ness. There is a routine, that turns the tote board of this ubiquitous gamble. Roll for new odds! You know, it will never stop, this Jamy addiction. One day, according to the status of my faith, we will run together. We will run to the hills, to the sea or to the valley of the sass. There are often days where my dreams will stake my kingdom for a chance to taste the peaches that grow there.

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cusp anew

awaken! well rested melody, and play
strum the strings of my joy and brighten
my bosom’s timbre, my shine
book me on your flight fantastic
float me through clouds of fancy
free, cotton candy dreams
minute mistral, whipping whisper
wants for waiting, longing sigh

i am new, and i am fresh
free and deep, in love with
life’s cusp, honing my vital
and thrilling my core

Higher place

The steam from my coffee rises across my sight, as too does the steam from the late afternoon rain on the blistered street. It’s moments like these that I wish I could etch into my memory with greater texture than I know is possible. A photograph will only remind me of the moment, never allowing the full glory of the cockatoos’ shriek, the smell of the ocean, or the sullen humidity in the air to once again enrich my senses. The realisation is bittersweet.

You sit across from me, reading. My eyes reach for you, imploring you to see what I see, hear what I hear, feel what I feel. Again, the realisation is bittersweet, as I am forlorn by the shawl you keep yourself wrapped in.  It’s as though you keep your soul wrapped in it as well. Hope follows me however, and I extend it to you.

I take solace in my existence and acknowledge that I am not alone, despite my loneliness. Love is all around, in forms neither of us knew of and are only now beginning to embrace.  I sip at my coffee once more and it’s warmth presses a smile to my lips. Imagine my surprise when at this very moment, you look up from your pages to smile at me, and with no words, acknowledge your gentle, comfortable silence of the moment. I am truly in love, and this now becomes the moment I wish I could etch into my memory.

I ask myself, what else is there to want, but to be here in this higher place.

early autumn joy

the crash of your ocean washes the confidence from my skin
replacing it with the turmoil of your desire
i might drown in it
or in my tears that tumble because of it

all sides of my sight are beset by your brilliant sun
where your eyes cast no shadow across me
i might burn from it
or from the fire ignited inside me from it

through my soul’s window, your willow’s whisper
breathes a love that flows but never ebbs
i might fly with it
or with joy that grows from the magic within it

shame’s skin

i have nothing but shame.
i want to do bad things
with mud between my toes,
and with destruction in mind
i swing, and strike with closed fist,
open hand, and bigoted eyes.
i steal and rape
cheat, lie and derive
no bitch’s satisfaction
from anything here, now
or then, but false promises
lost dreams, and unfulfilled
maniacal reason.
with that, i speak truths
in regretful ramblings, from
which only shame can save me

doppel’s crew

tonight is a virgin, bereft
of sensibility, aching on all walls,
the streets lined and dripping
with ochre blood.  we dance and drink
with forgotten stupor motion sick,
rubbing against the grains.

there’s a rabble, acquainted
by fire and brothers, and yet
i’m detached.  i alone view
from two, in the passage
of the breeze and circumstance,
my straight line and me.

in coma lay quiet, to peace,
my friend at my side.
he won’t scream with the party
people.  he won’t cry, another
lonely night as me, for losing
or never being enough.

breaze

i can hear your love
in the wind tonight
and it smells like flowers
in the rain

lay beside and cover
me with basking depth
bright and beauty snow eyes
on my skin

desire twinkling flicker
flames toward the sky
jinkle toes and fingers
curling tight

simple jazzy morning
humming calling day
curtains tease the summer
sense i’ve claimed

no punch line

i’m falling at a different rate to the rest of me
with eyes closed and steering the fade

another twitch is quickening
but with a humid, sluggish heart

shall i frame my humility or wear
my regret on the other sleeve?

with a long lens i’m looking, for more
but nothing’s panned, now or here

i doubt that each eighty-eight night
will know what’s next to spin me